Named after the shepherdess in Virgil's pastoral Eclogues. The Greek word amarysso means "to sparkle." In Victorian times, an "amaryllis" was a strong, confident, and beautiful woman.
Most people don't believe in destiny, or they don't want to acknowledge it. And...the future can be changed, but I do think there are some things that are always meant to happen. Even if they don't happen when or how you thought. Sounds a little like that. One thing that led to another.
[i'm coming to find i hate bg3 because everyone is so fucking ruined all the time WHY.
anyway, they were working before aerith was clocked in the face with a second memory, and she falters in her steps for a moment as she registers everything karlach says. she knew, of course. she knew the heart karlach has now isn't the same as an organic one, but to know you may die soon...to not feel that justice has been served. to have a goal in mind, and the horrifying realization that that goal isn't enough. the agony of thinking your time's coming soon, and you'll be pulled back into the desperate loneliness you've tried so hard to crawl out of, being torn from the people you love.
it's hard. she doesn't agree with lashing out when she can help it, more of a pacifist herself, but it's something she can understand. she can only imagine how hard this is.]
...I'm sorry. [she's not sure if she's apologizing for saying something stupid to trigger this, or for seeing it at all, or for what karlach's going through. maybe all of the above.]
[I'M CRYING (becks voice) ty is so mad at the bg3s
they come to a stop, and she breathes in sharp. closes her eyes. and then:]
It's alright. Or - it isn't, but it's how it is. [she'd had to accept it pretty fast, and she can't quite get herself to think about what it might be like if it wasn't like this. she's full of hope, but not for things that'll hurt in the end.]
I'm sorry. That's... exactly what I was trying to not let people know.
they stop, and aerith continues holding onto her hand while karlach takes time to collect herself. she doesn't rush it, giving her space to think and decide what she wants to say for herself.]
...it doesn't make sense to apologize for things that aren't your fault. [she means both for seeing the memory, and for what's happened to her.] ...there's really nothing that can be done though? At all?
[this started because she was talking about some things having to just be the way they are, but she didn't mean like this, damnit.]
You shouldn't. [no! what if we don't send people back to hell, actually!] I guess...I was just hoping that someone would know a way to fix this. If Gortash caused this, then...[couldn't there be a way to reverse it? is what she's thinking, but she doesn't say it.]
...I'm starting to understand now why the idea of wishes was ever presented to us at all.
A little. But I don't want to doom someone, if I end up dying here. If I get monstered, if I get picked off. [she was much more insistent about this to start, but she's wavering now.]
No. I...have suspicions of what happened last week, but I still hesitate to put a name to it. Or rather to who. I don't want to blame someone and have it be wrong. The last thing we need is spreading paranoia amongst ourselves.
...people are taking care of you, too, aren't they? I know you don't mind talking people down and that you care about them so much, but you need someone yourself, too. That's a lot for one person to bear.
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she follows aerith along, quiet.]
Yeah. Sometimes you just have to accept something is happening.
[which is maybe not exactly where aerith was going with that, but gives you another memory for CONTEXT.]
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anyway, they were working before aerith was clocked in the face with a second memory, and she falters in her steps for a moment as she registers everything karlach says. she knew, of course. she knew the heart karlach has now isn't the same as an organic one, but to know you may die soon...to not feel that justice has been served. to have a goal in mind, and the horrifying realization that that goal isn't enough. the agony of thinking your time's coming soon, and you'll be pulled back into the desperate loneliness you've tried so hard to crawl out of, being torn from the people you love.
it's hard. she doesn't agree with lashing out when she can help it, more of a pacifist herself, but it's something she can understand. she can only imagine how hard this is.]
...I'm sorry. [she's not sure if she's apologizing for saying something stupid to trigger this, or for seeing it at all, or for what karlach's going through. maybe all of the above.]
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they come to a stop, and she breathes in sharp. closes her eyes. and then:]
It's alright. Or - it isn't, but it's how it is. [she'd had to accept it pretty fast, and she can't quite get herself to think about what it might be like if it wasn't like this. she's full of hope, but not for things that'll hurt in the end.]
I'm sorry. That's... exactly what I was trying to not let people know.
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they stop, and aerith continues holding onto her hand while karlach takes time to collect herself. she doesn't rush it, giving her space to think and decide what she wants to say for herself.]
...it doesn't make sense to apologize for things that aren't your fault. [she means both for seeing the memory, and for what's happened to her.] ...there's really nothing that can be done though? At all?
[this started because she was talking about some things having to just be the way they are, but she didn't mean like this, damnit.]
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[she says, firmly. she brings her free hand up to rub at her face, exhaling just as sharp and harsh as she'd inhaled.]
I won't. I would rather die.
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...I'm starting to understand now why the idea of wishes was ever presented to us at all.
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[she says, quiet.]
... But yeah. Can't say the wishes weren't real fucking tempting.
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...are they still tempting now?
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A little. But I don't want to doom someone, if I end up dying here. If I get monstered, if I get picked off. [she was much more insistent about this to start, but she's wavering now.]
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[because she agrees still. there's too much of a risk of taking someone else out if you become a target yourself.]
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[firmly.]
I won't kill someone for my own gain.
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Yeah. I worried that's what it was last week, but... guess it wasn't.
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No. I...have suspicions of what happened last week, but I still hesitate to put a name to it. Or rather to who. I don't want to blame someone and have it be wrong. The last thing we need is spreading paranoia amongst ourselves.
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Yeah, you're right. Feels like half my existence these days is talking people down from the edge.
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...people are taking care of you, too, aren't they? I know you don't mind talking people down and that you care about them so much, but you need someone yourself, too. That's a lot for one person to bear.
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Sure. I've got you, haven't I?
[:upsidedownsmile:]
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Well yeah, but...other people, too. Just in case I don't always know the right things to say, or if it's not enough. You deserve that much, you know?
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Well, thanks. [...] I don't know, I'm all good. I can find someone if I need it.
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Promise you will?
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I promise. [taps her nose.]
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Okay. Good. Then in that case...let's keep going down the road then and see what's waiting for us.
[and we can wrap this...gooby :(]