[ SURELY, I SAID. SURELY IT WILL NOT BE AS BAD THIS WEEK. HONKS MY LITTLE CLOWN NOSE.
anyway!!! rondo sure is in the forest still. he's just sitting by the gravestone, curled up in a ball with his head in his knees, arms folded across them. did he ever even leave? hard to say.
at any rate. if he has company he has not noticed it yet, but even from a distance it is like, blatantly obvious that his shoulders are shaking. ]
when she sees him, she lets out a quiet little sigh - something empathetic, something sorry. she comes over to sit by him, resting a hand on his back. curling close. rubs his arm, whatever she can reach.]
[ resisting every urge to just right ANYWAY ITS FINE HE'S FINE in this tag shakes in hogging drama im sorry
it's. it's bad! he's shaking when karlach touches his back - his head stays buried in his arms, and he doesn't move at first when karlach addresses him, just hiccuping, quietly. he's clearly crying, but that's not a surprise.
after a few moments, he says, in the tiniest voice: ] ...I didn't even get to say goodbye.
she shifts so she can just pull him into her lap, gently. he gets her running her fingers through his hair - she'll tug the ribbon out to make it easier for now, tying it around his wrist.]
[ oh!! well!! it can join the other one there! there's a pink ribbon neatly tied around his wrist. so now there are two! yay.
he just allows himself to be manhandled - a rare occasion for rondo, six feet and full of muscles. it makes him feel like a little kid, but in a good way, a safe way, and he just turns his face against her neck, wet and miserable, and nods. ]
...we... we spend - we always spend our Thursdays together.
she tucks his head under her chin and lets him settle.]
I'm sorry it's always so abrupt. [she murmurs, closing her eyes.] Sort of running out of those little nice things to say, you know? They're starting to not mean anything.
[honestly what do you even say when your friends die week after week after week.]
[ he's quiet, for a long, long time, just - staying like that. shoulders shaking, trembling like a leaf.
and then, in the tiniest, tiniest voice in the world: ] ... I didn't even ... I didn't... I didn't tell her I wanted... I wanted to keep - keep it blooming.
silence, for a long moment, and then she exhales out, slow and sad. her heart aches - she thinks she knows exactly how this feels, and it makes that gutted, horrible feeling in her chest wrench and drop.
she squeezes him a little closer.]
... I'm sure she knew. [she says, soft.] And even if she didn't, it might not be the end. Remember?
[ he knows that - it reverberates somewhere in the back of his mind. he knows. it's just. ]
... I was the one who found her. [ voice small, wet. last week, iwatooshi. this week, marina. rondo has hope. he has so much of it - he'll never, ever let it go - but right now, he's just heartbroken, and all of his energy is just going to holding himself together. ]
... Okay. Alright. We're going to get up, and we're going to go sit somewhere that isn't here. We're not going to torture ourselves. [she says, not unkindly.] You're sad, and that's okay. Gods have you got the right to be, but this is only making you feel worse.
[ just like last week, he just looks up at her, lower lip trembling, and he just - he just nods. he doesn't have the strength to do anything else, right now. ]
[ uppies... he doesn't even fight it, just kind of numbly loops an arm around her shoulders, and... does. he hasn't stopped, really, tears just streaking down his cheeks.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
week 3, friday.
anyway!!! rondo sure is in the forest still. he's just sitting by the gravestone, curled up in a ball with his head in his knees, arms folded across them. did he ever even leave? hard to say.
at any rate. if he has company he has not noticed it yet, but even from a distance it is like, blatantly obvious that his shoulders are shaking. ]
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when she sees him, she lets out a quiet little sigh - something empathetic, something sorry. she comes over to sit by him, resting a hand on his back. curling close. rubs his arm, whatever she can reach.]
Hey, sweetheart.
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it's. it's bad! he's shaking when karlach touches his back - his head stays buried in his arms, and he doesn't move at first when karlach addresses him, just hiccuping, quietly. he's clearly crying, but that's not a surprise.
after a few moments, he says, in the tiniest voice: ] ...I didn't even get to say goodbye.
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she shifts so she can just pull him into her lap, gently. he gets her running her fingers through his hair - she'll tug the ribbon out to make it easier for now, tying it around his wrist.]
To Marina? [that's what she's guessing, anyway.]
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he just allows himself to be manhandled - a rare occasion for rondo, six feet and full of muscles. it makes him feel like a little kid, but in a good way, a safe way, and he just turns his face against her neck, wet and miserable, and nods. ]
...we... we spend - we always spend our Thursdays together.
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she tucks his head under her chin and lets him settle.]
I'm sorry it's always so abrupt. [she murmurs, closing her eyes.] Sort of running out of those little nice things to say, you know? They're starting to not mean anything.
[honestly what do you even say when your friends die week after week after week.]
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and then, in the tiniest, tiniest voice in the world: ] ... I didn't even ... I didn't... I didn't tell her I wanted... I wanted to keep - keep it blooming.
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silence, for a long moment, and then she exhales out, slow and sad. her heart aches - she thinks she knows exactly how this feels, and it makes that gutted, horrible feeling in her chest wrench and drop.
she squeezes him a little closer.]
... I'm sure she knew. [she says, soft.] And even if she didn't, it might not be the end. Remember?
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... I was the one who found her. [ voice small, wet. last week, iwatooshi. this week, marina. rondo has hope. he has so much of it - he'll never, ever let it go - but right now, he's just heartbroken, and all of his energy is just going to holding himself together. ]
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[she sighs, tucking his hair behind his ear.]
... Okay. Alright. We're going to get up, and we're going to go sit somewhere that isn't here. We're not going to torture ourselves. [she says, not unkindly.] You're sad, and that's okay. Gods have you got the right to be, but this is only making you feel worse.
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[she's just going to carry him, sorry about it. hoist. and then, soft, as she adjusts him.]
You can cry. It's alright, I'm here.
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quietly: ]
... the dream I had... it was about her.
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and then she wipes that off her face.]
A week in and already ready for marriage, huh? [she teases gently.] Must've been sweet.
[talk about the good parts. remember the good parts, she thinks.]
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he shakes his head - but he lets out a tiny, tiny hiccup of what could be a laugh. ]
Until the end. [ you know the. toes. god. it's a tiny bit closer to normalcy, at least. ]
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Until the end, yeah. I've got no control over that particular bit. [...] We'll figure it out tomorrow, alright? We'll get it.
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... the... I doubt anyone would want to hurt her. The person who did it... I'm sure they... they must be suffering, too.
[ considering iwatooshi, last week. they have to find whoever did it. ]
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[that doesn't really make her feel better about it, but it is what it is.]
I'd like to figure out Tomizawa, too.
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... me too.